Dad Update again

Dad went to the Drs again this week to follow up on last weeks visit and Renie went with him with LOTS of questions. Understandably.

Most of Renie’s questions were about Dad’s allowed level of activities. Like, should he be going up the stairs to the apartment, should he be running a marathon, that kind of stuff. Obviously, there are no marathons in Dad’s future but he is allowed to do what ever he wants, he just has to listen to his body. His heart will tell him if he’s overtaxing it.

And if he gets blockheaded about listening to his heart, his heart will make SURE he listens. Like the day he was coming down the steps and got dizzy and fell the rest of the way. He was not hurt but had to sit at the bottom for a while. That was the day Renie wanted to switch apartments with me and dad said NO.

Dad is supposed to use his head about his activity levels and getting plenty of rest. The Dr will also sign that he needs a scooter for getting around so that will help him as well. Renie is working on that with the insurance company today.

This Dr said there is a 25% chance that Dad wouldn’t make it through the surgery to repair his valves with his heart the way it is now. So they don’t want to take that chance and are moving on to other options.

The Dr is concerned about Dad and the heat this summer.  He will be easily dehydrated by the heat but then we have to watch to make sure he doesn't start retaining water because that will mean there is fluid around his heart and that's not good either.  It will be a delicate balance that Dad will have to find by paying attention to his body. 

I in the meantime, have to find a nice hunk-a-male to help put Dads air conditioners in the windows when it starts heating up outside.  Or it will be me and BFF Neicy doing it.  But either way, it WILL get done and without Dad touching a single one!

The other questions that were answered were of course about the heart transplant and the pump. The Dr wants Dad to see a specialist at University of PA to be evaluated for both. They have had good success with the pump procedure; lots of patients don’t need the heart transplant.

So, they will be setting Dad up for an evaluation with this TOP Dr at U of P to see what the next step with them will be.  Until then, status quo.

Jaxon is 16 weeks old!

Jaxon is 16 weeks old this week.  4 whole months!

He is SO good and SO smart.

Jaxon knows to sit and stay.

He LOVES to run on the beach

Jaxon asks to go out for potty breaks.

He can get up on the couch by himself now.

Jaxon plays fetch for HOURS.

He chases stuffed animals, which my stepmother gets at yard sales because of course Jaxon chews on EVERYTHING

I should ask her not to get stuffed animals that look so much like the real kitties, though.

When I say "give me your face!" he puts his nose up and into the leash.

Jaxon is a snuggler.  He LOVES to snuggle with you on the couch.

The other night, he got up on the couch with me and started chewing on me.  I told him that I was not a chew toy.  He got down, grabbed a chew toy and came back up.

And he has stopped stealing the TP.

What a cutie!

The Compound

I have described The Compound where I live before. I have told the story of Phyllis the nutcase druggie here.

Well, things have gotten SO much worse with her and her lease is not up for another 3 months. Ugh. Kathy has told her that she will not be renewing it and if she finds a place to move to before the end of it, she will not hold her to it. YAY!

Poor Kathy has been made sick by all this crap that is going on. She is on nerve meds and is taking Tums like they are candy.

One good thing is that the police have been out to The Compound quite frequently and I have had lots of chances to flirt with them. There is even one that wants to come over and celebrate with us when Phyllis (Druggie) leaves. AWESOME! I think he’s the cutest of them all.

Anyway, while before Phyllis was just annoying and obnoxious, has elevated herself to out right STUPID by the fact that she gets stoned, either on her Rx meds or the recreational drugs she takes, She has claimed that someone broke into her apartment, drugged and raped her and stole $9,000 worth of jewelry from her.

Of course, she had no idea who came into the apartment, could not describe the jewelry that was stolen, and even went to the hospital to get checked out, all of which was negative. The police and detectives looked all over her apartment and didn’t find anything.

Also, she has 8 doorknob sets up there and can’t seem to get one to work. The other night, she came down to Kathy’s place and asked who was on her porch and stripped the screws from her doorknob. Of course, no one had been up there and SHE is the one who stripped the screws when she used a HAMMER to put them in.

But she called the police and Officer Cutie came over and checked things out and even installed the lock for her. He then stopped by the picnic table where we all were gathered laughing at her to chat. He said they know she is nuts but since she claimed rape and they can’t disprove it yet, they have to put up with her.

On Friday afternoon, we were all outside enjoying the weather and she was up on her deck passed out in her lounge chair with her purse beside her. My Dad blew the horn when he was under where she was and she didn’t stir. Anyway, Son’s father came to get him and I left to get my bike fixed. When I got home, she wasn’t there anymore but her boyfriends truck was in the driveway. I assumed he got her up and took her inside.

Around 1:30 in the morning, I was woke up by the ambulance coming down the road. I looked out and saw 2 police cars out there. So I got up and took Jaxon for a walk to see what was going on. Neighbor, Len poked his head out the door to ask me if I knew what was going on. I was over there chatting (Len lives under Druggie) when one of the cops came out to talk with us. I was quick to point out that I live over there in the other house and was just taking the puppy for a walk.

Len told Officer Hottie (yes, he’s a different one from Cutie!) what he heard happen up in her apartment after everyone went about their business. After I left, Len went inside. He heard the boyfriend (aka Ball-less) pull into the driveway and assumed that he was getting her up and inside. Shortly after that he heard a bone crushing crash to the floor and then she was wailing that she had fallen. He said that went on for a few minutes and he also heard the boyfriend trying to comfort her. Then all went quiet so Len assumed that she passed out again.

Then Len heard the boyfriend leave around 9:00. We don’t know what time he came back but the neighbors were woken up around 1:30 to the police and ambulance. She was claiming that someone beat her up and that’s where she got the broken nose and gash over her eye.

Officer Hottie said they (Phyllis and Ball-less) were giving a completely different story. They pulled Ball-less out of the apartment to talk with him and hopefully get the real story, which unfortunately didn’t happen. Eventually, everyone went away and we all went back to sleep.

While I was in Maryland visiting, the cops were called back by Phyllis because she wants to file charges that she was beat up by someone. Of course, she has no idea who punched her in the face.

The cop who came over was Officer Cutest. When he was done with Phyllis, he went to Kathy’s house to talk with her. They are working on getting enough facts to prove that she is nuts. He asked if Len would give the police a written statement of the facts as he observed and heard them.

While we were all having dinner together on Sunday, we joked that we should assign the cops their own space since they were there almost as much as we are. Since Dad’s car is in the shop, they have an extra space, that’s where we put it.

The police haven't been called back since we put up the sign.  bummer!

So the calm and quiet of The Compound has been broken frequently by this nutcase but we only have until August 1st before she has to be out. There will be a party at my house on August 2nd or the first Saturday after that. In the meantime, I’m going to enjoy the smorgasbord of Officers who are around.

Total Randomness!

The sun is out! Finally. So much rain lately. We even had a awesome thunderstorm over the weekend. Jaxon was not phased by it either. Such a good pup.

Over the weekend Son, Jaxon and I went to MD to visit with Son’s other grandmom. She is my mom’s best friend and when Mom was dying she said that Judy would be Son’s other grandmother. So of course, its been a while since we visited so we went. Jaxon traveled well, he curled up on the seat and slept for the ride.

The police have been at The Compound a lot lately because of Phyllis and her nuttiness. But that’s another post.

Work has been a little crazy too. I had several applications due at the same time and then a funder scheduled a site visit for 4 of our 5 sites. I am in charge of the Policies and Procedure Manuals, which were supposed to be updated when the new CEO was placed but I was not allowed to take care of it. So when they were notified of the site visits, guess who had to RUSH through updating the 4 manuals in less than a week. At least all the manuals are the same and I just had to make 4 sets of P&P’s and put them in the books. And now its done except for the other 2 books. But I need paper for those 2 books and supplies are not being ordered for some reason.

I have finished coordinating the summer camp schedule for Son with his father. I have 2 weeks of vacation with Son but need to come up with ideas of something to do for at least one of those weeks.

My new bike was broken. I lost one brake pad on the front. Made for scary stopping. I took it over to the bike shop and they fixed me up in a jiffy for no charge. Gotta love free!

Check out other randomness at the Un Mom! Lots of fun over there!

Dad Update and My Boys

I am going to start this with goodness.  My Boys walking to the bus stop.

Jaxon loves to follow Son on the curbing.  So cute!

Dad Update:  (previous entries, Here)

Dad went back to the Drs yesterday and left with some shocking news.  They said that his heart will always be too weak for them to operate and repair/replace the valves.  He will not be a good candidate for that surgery.  They are recommending two alternatives to help him.  One is a heart transplant.  CRAP.  I had to sit down when he told me that.  What a shock that my dad is THAT sick.  Well, not yet but he could be.  Medically, he is not ready for a transplant but they want to get him on the list so that when he IS there, he's ready.

The second option, I don't know much info about and neither did Dad.  They want to put a pump on his current heart, which will help to relieve some of the stress on it.  Its a fairly new device but they have had success with it.  One of the Drs who helped to develop it is somewhat local and Dad will be going to see him very soon.

We have lots of questions about both options and feel that we have time to get the answers to those questions, especially since Dad is doing pretty well right now.  

In the meantime, we are making a list of our questions and are going to enjoy our time together!

SHOCKING!

Every year, Son goes to the local YMCA day camp for the summer and LOVES it.  He knows the routine and gets to swim EVERYDAY!  To my budget its expensive but given Son's enjoyment, its worth it.

Anyway, I have been corresponding about summer camp for Son with his father.  You register early and get a discount and every little bit helps.  You may remember my troubles in dealing with his father.  If not, here's a little reminder.......

 

This weekend was Son's weekend with his Dad.  But the Autism Center was going to the Philly zoo on Sunday so I asked if I could pick Son up early and take him.  His father agreed.  That's NOT the shocking part.

With the restraints still in place in the divorce, when we exchange Son one of us stays in the car till the other says good bye and Son is making his way across the parking spaces (yes, many, many spaces!). 

On Sunday, his father parked with only ONE space between us. This made me a little nervous but since it was BJ's parking lot, there were TONS of people around if I needed anything.  I got out and opened the hatch for Son to stow his bag, then moved to the safe side of the car.  Son came over and so did his father!  YIKES.  I haven't been that close to him without an officer in the room in 4 years.

The shocking part is that he handed me a CHECK FOR SUMMER CAMP.  I know my chin hit the ground and I stuttered asking what was going on.  He said since he has overtime and extra money right now, he's going to pay in advance.  Chin on ground AGAIN.

NEVER in the past has he been ahead on ANYTHING concerning Son.  I usually end up in COURT to get his portion of things. 

So Folks, if we have a blizzard, IT'S NOT MY FAULT!  lol    And I am waiting for the other shoe to drop.

THIEF!

There is a thief in my house and I caught him this morning!

Jaxon is stealing the TP from the bathroom. 

I'd better check under the couch to see if that's where he is hiding it!

Happy Weekend!

Lincoln Financial Field

Sunday, Son and I joined the group from the Autism Center to go to Lincoln Field, where the Philadelphia Eagles play.  Childrens Hospital of Philadelphia was hosting a Huddle Up for Autism Day.  They have a fairly new Autism program at CHOP and it was a fund raiser for them.

Son standing near the entrance.

There were LOTS of people there.   Many with their special needs kids as well as kids without disabilities.  There was plenty for the kids to do, arts and crafts, computer games, moon bounces, face painting and a guy making balloon things.

Son did some Arts and Crafts as well as some computer games, then we had a quick lunch.

After lunch, we stood in line for the moon bounce.

Son decided he wanted a balloon thing so we stood in line for that as well.

This is not what he wanted but after waiting in line for 2 hours, it was time to leave and the balloon guy wasn't making elaborate balloon creations anymore.  Son took the news pretty well.  Only a little meltdown and he was able to pull himself together quickly.  I was proud of him.

Some of the kids needed a quiet room. There was SO much noise and other stimuli for the autistic kids.  But the Eagles had offered up their luxury boxes for quiet rooms. One of the people on the bus with us said they spent most of the day there with their grandson.  They raved over how nice it was.

We could have taken a tour of the center as well as gotten face painting and autographs but we were stuck in line because there was only ONE balloon guy and Son HAD to have one.

Overall it was a nice day. Son behaved and listened to me for the most part. And it was a day out!

I am Weak (A Pity Party for Me)

I am tired and weak today. Son and I had a major blow up. He always argues with me, its part of the Aspergers. Its been getting worse lately and I have been working with the Autism Center to get help.


Today was AWFUL. The day started out just like any other, me nagging him to tell me what he wanted for breakfast and lunch. After asking him for 15 minutes, I told him that I was going to make the decision for him. He would have to eat whatever I felt like making. He got nasty with me, saying that he wasn’t going to eat what I made and other stuff. I told him that’s fine, you will be the one who is hungry, not me.

He continued to argue with me that he should get what he wanted and he wasn’t going to accept anything less.

I lost it. I told him that I hated living here with him. No mother should hate her child but I do. I cried. I yelled some more. I said some pretty inappropriate things to him. I don’t regret them yet but I will.

He got ready to walk out the door to walk to his other grandparents. I forbid him from going. He got smart with me. I spanked him. He cried and screamed he wanted his father. I told him that his father doesn’t want him other than on weekends. I asked him how it felt that neither of your parents don’t want you around. Maybe you should think about why that is.

I was harsh. But I am at the end of my rope. I have no more strength left to fight him with. I feel horrible that I don’t like my child. What kind of mother hates to be with her child? Put me in the class with that mother who shipped her adopted child back to Russia.

I don’t know what else to do other than to sit here and cry. And hope that I find the strength to fight with him again after work. And then again tomorrow morning. And every day after that.

What kind of a life is that? And is there a time when you have tried everything and just have to give up and accept that its not going to change?

Dad's New Job

Yes, my Dad has a new Job for the spring.  For those who know what's going on with my Dad's Heart, yes, he probably shouldn't be working.  If you want to read what's going on with Dad, go here.

But, this new job is PREFECT for him right now.  And we are all glad to have him doing it for us. 

He gets to watch the grass grow.

The lawn guy tilled up the front (river-side) yard and planted new grass.  Dad's job is to watch it grow and keep it watered. 

Go Dad!

National Cherry Blossom Festival

Easter Weekend, Neicy and I took off and went to Washington DC.  I had never seen the Cherry Blossoms and it is an experience I recommend to anyone!  They are BEAUTIFUL!  See:

We got there on Friday, checked into the hotel and started walking.  The weather was gorgeous, the company as always was wonderful and the sites were lovely!  We walked around the mall and up to Chinatown.  We probably walked about 7 miles.

Saturday was a little cloudy to start but the sun quickly came out.  We again started out on the Mall, headed to the Capital and then made our way to the Lincoln Memorial.  A little detour to the Vietnam Memorial and then over to the Tidal Basin for a close up of the trees.  We ended up over by the Jefferson Memorial and then made our way back to the hotel to call Neicy's daughter who lives in Fairfax.  She was coming into DC to join us for dinner and to see the fireworks.

Neicy and I also walked into town for drinks while waiting for Allie to get into town.  We ordered a Cherry-Sherry Martini.  It was yummy and sitting outside watching the city go by was so nice that we ordered another.  Never did we ask the PRICE of these special drinks so when the bill was brought we went into sticker shock!  They were $12 per DRINK!  Plus TAX.  Crap!   OK!

After the Martini's we picked up Alli and Aaron and walked to dinner.  After dinner, we headed to the Waterfront for the fireworks.  Then WALKED back to the hotel.  I mapped out most of the walking we did and it totaled about 15 miles.  No wonder I couldn't feel my feet, I think I left them in the tidal basin!

Sunday dawned beautiful weather again.  Neicy had found this wonderful sounding cherry dish that we wanted to try but I wasn't able to get reservations at the place.  We walked to Founding Farmers, which when mapped out was over 2 miles from the hotel.  Ok.  Starting the day with a 4 mile round trip.  But, I wanted pics of the White House which was on the way.

Back to the food.  We ordered the Chocolate-Cherry French Toast to split as well as a breakfast for each of us.  I thought I died and went to heaven!  Fresh squeezed juices, cage free eggs!  YUMMY!!!  ALL the food was THAT good!  I didn't eat again until Monday morning!

After breakfast, we waddled back to the car and headed home.  Overall it was a very nice weekend!

My Jaxon

I have always maintained that I am a cat person.  I love cats and have never really taken to other people dogs.  They're ok, but give me my cats.  I cannot believe how much FUN Jaxon is!  He is sweet and lovable and SO wants to please!  And what a QUICK learner!  I show him things once and as long as he wants to do it, he can.

Jaxon was checking out the fish that Son caught the other day. 

Jaxon didn't quite know what to make of it.

He is over 5 pounds now, the vet was pleased with him at the last visit.  He walks on the leash to and from the bus stop in the mornings.  He knows how to sit and stay (still working on the Staying part, especially when the kitties are around!).  He is starting to ASK to go outside for potty breaks and he is able to sleep most of the night.  We only get up around 4:30 and today it was 5!  I think that's pretty great for a 13 week puppy!

He loves to run on the beach at low tide and can now go up the steps to the Grandparents place. And since he gets treats when he goes there, its hard to keep him down sometimes!

Jaxon and Son are learning how to play together.  There were a couple of instances where Son was a little rambunctious with him but I think we have worked that out with a little more supervision and instructions.

Needless to say, I am a TOTAL convert to dog lover!  At least for Jaxon

Lego Group

Lego Group.  Hmmmmm.  After all the anticipation to get started, Son has been less than enthused with it.  Two weeks ago when I picked him up, he said he wasn't going back.  That's what YOU think, I thought to myself.

We always go to Burger King after group for dinner and talk about group and school.  So he knows the routine and we talked, I mean he really opened up to me about group and his feelings.  I was SO proud of him for THAT!

He told me what happened (a little skewed from the story I the group leader told me later :)  Basically, he was upset that this Lego group wasn't happening the same way the Lego group worked in his old school.  BUT, that was more individual therapy and THIS Lego group is more about GROUP.   He maintained that the leader didn't know what she was doing.  That she didn't know how to run a Lego group.

He also was upset that he asked several (he said ALL) of the kids to build the project he wanted and NO ONE even answered him (imagine this being said with lots of pre-teen angst).  The group leader emailed me that he asked maybe 2 kids and they did respond but they didn't want to build what Son wanted.  So Son went and sat by himself instead of being flexible and going to another group.  

Things I suggested to Son to think about before the next group is that the other Lego group was to help him learn a completely different skill set, that this group is to learn how to work with LOTS of kids, not just one other.  He needs to try to be more flexible and learn to go with the flow, something that I know is VERY hard for AS kids.  He needs to have patience with the other kids in the group because they are there to learn the same skills as him and they might not know HOW to respond to his request to build.  And last and most importantly, that he needs to go to the next group thinking about how much fun he is going to have and not about how disappointed he was with group before.

I also let the leader know all this to find out the complete story as well as to help her learn about Son.  She was thrilled to get the info and made some changes to the group for this week. Son went in excited to be there and had a wonderful time. 

My concern for this week was that he was working with only one other kid.  Just like the old Lego group.  BUT, I am not saying anything yet.  I am going to assume that the leader will shuffle the kids around and that Son will have a chance to work in a larger group next week.  And if he doesn't then I will suggest to the leader to shuffle him around.

Overall, I am pleased with Lego Group and with the leaders of the group.  The newest leader is the teacher that helped to diagnose Son in the first grade.  So she knows him and how to get him to work.  This is a good thing!

I have a couple of posts in the can this week and I will try to get around to check out what you've been up to!

Jaxon gets Bike Sick

I took Jaxon for a bike ride tonight.  And he got sick.  Poor baby! 

He also got sick in the car yesterday on the way to Lego Group. 

I hope this is something he will out grow!

First Fish

Son spent Easter Monday fishing.  This is his first catch:

Good Job!

But can you catch a keeper?