how do you know when to throw in the towel on something? when do you decide that this isn't working anymore and there seems to be nothing to do to change it? most importantly, how do you see past your broken heart to do what is best for someone else?
I sit here on this lonely Sunday night in tears with a broken heart. I don't know what to do or where to turn. And thanks to schedules this week, I don't think I will have the time to take care of things and find answers.
After a horrendous weekend with much yelling, punishments, taking away of favorite toys, I sat down to have this conversation with Son:
Me: I can't do this anymore. Its not fair to either of us to live with all this yelling and anger. I have done everything that I know to do in order for life to get better for us here. Do you have any suggestions?
blank stare from Son.
Me: My only other suggestion is for you to live with your dad.
Son: can that happen?
Me: We have to go through the courts to change custody and he said he would take you.
Son: Would I still see you?
Me: Every other weekend just like you do with your Dad now.
Son: I'd miss Jaxon. Can I take my toys?
Me: No. They'd be here for when you visited.
Son: I like your shirt.
I just threw up my hands and walked away. I don't know if he wants to live with his dad or not. All I know is its not fair to either of us to live as we are. Miserable.
And I won't get into my sense of failure as a mother right now.