There are several reason why I am thinking that I am nuts and need therapy. The first being that I want to SWIM with THIS:
Uh….. ice bergs, Neicy? Do you really think we should be doing this? Maybe we should have our heads checked. In case you missed my Polar Bear post, go here..... But this is not the only reason I think I need my head checked.
I have mentioned on here that I am not feeling myself. When I first started feeling down and easily annoyed, I kinda thought maybe its just the winter blues. After all, November and December have the shortest days, the least sunlight. But the more I sit and think about things, the more I realize that I am feeling depression again, not just the winter blues.
I am showing classic signs of depression. How do I know? Cause I’ve been there and beat that. See, when my ex told me he wanted a divorce, I hit bottom. And it wasn’t pretty. I’m not feeling that bad, yet. I have recognized some of my symptoms and can hopefully pull myself back up. If I can’t, then I will find my therapist. She was the best, without her and some of my closest friends, I would not have survived as well as I did.
Ok. What do you have to be depressed about, you ask? I have NO clue. I have a job, which while not my dream job, is at least an easy one with a good paycheck. I have a wonderful son, who is doing SO FREAKING WELL in school not just grades but his behavior has been THE BEST EVER! I have wonderful friends and family who love me and support me in every way. I love them all! I have a home that is cozy, clean and ALL mine.
Yet, I am still sad. Eating like a horse. Sleeping a lot yet in pieces. Annoyed by the littlest things. Tired of being around myself. I can’t concentrate.
I remember the coping skills Kate taught me. I just don’t have the energy to apply them. I need someone to kick me in the butt. I need to get off my ass and take care of myself, mentally, physically and emotionally.
So. Let’s start by reviewing some of the coping skills from Kate.
1. Exercise – releases good feeling hormones and tires you out to help you sleep. Not to mention the calories you will burn.
2. Stick to a sleeping schedule – just cause you are bored, do NOT go to bed before bedtime. Your body gets into a habit and if you go to bed when you are tired, you will sleep longer.
3. Eat when you are hungry, not when you are tired, bored, stressed, angry. This will help with the excessive weight gain.
4. NO Caffeine. This messes with your mood and sleep patterns.
5. Meditation. It relaxes you. It really does! I used to use it frequently.
6. Sunshine. You need sunshine.
6. Sunshine. You need sunshine.
Starting tomorrow evening, I will exercise for at least 30 minutes every night. My new bedtime will be 10:30. I will try to pay attention to WHEN I am eating and WHY. And although I haven’t had caffeine for several weeks, I will avoid caffeine. I will start my meditation again. I wil do my best to find sunshine for at least 15 minutes every day.
If my mood doesn’t improve in a week, I will then make an effort to find my therapist again and get professional help. I think I can live with myself for another week.
By live with myself, I don’t mean that I am considering suicide. I am NO where near THAT. Been there before and I am NO WHERE near that depressed.
I just wish I could live outside my head, somewhere that’s nicer. One week of diligently applying the coping skills to see if there is any improvement.