Thursday, June 17, 2010

Homework Update

This is one of the subjects I have been trying to avoid thinking about.  Except that its on my mind everyday, all day long.  Every interaction with Son results in me thinking about reflective listening, staying calm and collected, how can I turn this into a compliment and about a hundred other things.  Too many things!

Anyway, I have been practicing my homework assignments as best I can.  I haven't been counting the compliments every day but I know there are many more floating around here than there were in the past.  I have been practing reflective listening with him, especially when we were talking about Son's bad weekend with his dad recently.  More on THAT later, I am still "discussing" it with his father. HA!  We even started a game of Monopoly!  Yes, I played with my son!

I am working on thinking better about myself and loosing the negative thoughts.  I think this is the hardest one to practice.  It has been a habit for so many years. I am really getting into the bike rides in the morning and on the weekends, which is having a positive affect on my mood as well as my scale!  Woo ho! Heck, I even opened up in Wal-Mart and flirted with a guy while we waited in line!  THAT's a good ego booster; that he flirted back!  :)  Oh boy, am I outta practice though!  Time to step it up and practice! 
I have been avoiding thinking about the person I used to be, the Bitch with a Mission.    There are so many unorganized thoughts in my head about this.  I REALLY need to sit down and put them on paper to see where they lead.  Maybe tomorrow. :)

I am trying to relax about things, especially Son's behaviors.  This is hard too.  I worry too much about what people think about my abilities as his mother.  "Wow, she didn't teach him anything!  What a failure she is!"  I think as I get more relaxed into who I am, this will get easier.  As I get more confident in ME, it will matter less to have control over Son and what people are thinking of me.

I have done NOTHING about contacting Dog Trainers yet.  Its on the list of things to do.  I will get to it.  Promise!

Son saw the therapist this week and she didn't say anything when she brought him back, so I have to assume that nothing too bad came out tonight and that he behaved.  Son will be going every other week and I will be going on the opposite weeks.  She stepped this up for me so I guess I need the therapy as much as Son does.  That's ok, I'll take it.  I'll take ANY help I can get to be the best mom that Son deserves.


  1. Too funny about flirting with the guy at Wal-Mart.

  2. see i love the spirit in that last line...sounds like you are trying with the homework...small steps complete the journey...playing with him is great...going through a tough one right now where the kid feels unloved b/c mom never does anything with dad in the picture...

  3. Starting to recognize your thoughts and behavior is a great first step to getting where you want to be! :)

  4. wow, you are doing a lot of hard work -- with yourself and your son. just being aware of the negative self-talk/thoughts is a great first step. a lot of people (clients and/or parents) don't do the "homework," so that is progress, too. i'm glad you are giving yourself your own time with the therapist.

  5. See? That's what makes you such a good mom, because you CARE so much!!!

    You are amazing!

  6. "I'll take ANY help I can get to be the best mom that Son deserves."

    You GO, Mom! (wink)


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