On my short drive to work today, I was thinking about how much negative thoughts I have every day. How judgmental I can be, even if its just in my head. I also was thinking about Dharma (from Dharma and Greg, the TV show) and how she is so free and loving of all things. She doesn’t get mad at anything or anyone. She has fun at everything she does, even a trip to the hardware store. Dharma is just free and easy and that flows over into everyone and everything in her life. Yes, I know it’s a TV show and everything works out perfectly in the end. Why can’t I be more like her and see the good/fun in everything?
Then because I live just outside of town, I got to work and this train of thought was replaced with the piles on my desk.
When I was going through my email there was one in there that made me continue my thoughts on positive thinking. I subscribe to a Thought for Today email service. Lots of times, I read it and just delete it. Other days, it really hits home. Today was one of those Hit Home days.
“When a person drowns himself in negative thinking he is committing an unspeakable crime against himself. – Maxwell Maltz”
It goes on to explain that we get power from holding a dismal and gloomy outlook can deprive us of the positive and pleasant parts of life. We emotionally beat ourselves up before life and others can do it for us. By being negative first, we think we are saving ourselves from being hurt. I am guilty of this. The therapist suggested that I am “emotionally cutting” myself. Nice, huh?
Giving up the negative feelings and therefore the “power” is risky to us. And its not something that can be done in one day. Its recommended that we start by imagining ourselves with a more open attitude toward ourselves and the world. Then, you can try it out in the world, just a little bit at a time. Eventually, this will become a habit and there you will be with a more positive attitude about life and ourselves in general.
Before I read this email, I had already decided to challenge myself with being more positive today. It started with a post to facebook “Happy Wednesday.” No complaints that there are still workdays left, about Jaxon chewing my shoes or any number of negative things I could have found. Just “lets be happy for today.” One of my friends replied asking what was so good about it. She was just kidding and wished me a great day (Thanks and hugs, Janet!). I still responded to her with a list of what I had found to be happy about today.
The other part of the challenge was for me to smile at 10 people today. I usually keep to myself or just talk with Neicy when we are out walking. Well, today I am going to keep my head up (except on the rough parts of the sidewalks), look people in the eye, and smile. Hopefully, they will smile back.
As they smile back, my confidence in myself should increase and happy feeling should flood my brain. Then I will become addicted to the happy feelings and I will realize that I don’t have to hurt myself first to have power over me and my life.
So Neicy and I had our first walk today and as we were walking toward each other, she commented how good I look today. There were some happy feelings right there. Thanks and hugs, Neicy! We did our walk, chatting the whole time as usual. But I was looking up and around and making eye contact with people we passed. Then I smiled at a little old lady. Her face lit up, she smiled back, asked how we were doing, and I know I just made her day. Same as she made mine.
Where’s my easy button? That was SO easy. Of course, it was easy today because I was already feeling pretty good about myself, with a new haircut (LOVE IT!) and great push up bra (where'd they come from)! Eventually, I will become more like Dharma, enjoying everything and everyone in my life, with little negativity.