Saturday, May 29, 2010

Saturday Seriousness - Balancing Act

I love the comments I get on some of my posts, I don’t get very many but I love the ones that are there. I have always gotten wonderful, happy, uplifting comments from you guys. Thank you SO much for that!

One comment I received recently was from Tanya @ Teen Autism. She is a single mother with a teenage son on the spectrum that I follow. I have learned a lot from her posts and she has some great links to other sites for help in dealing with our Spectrum Kids.

Tanya said (of my Avoidance post) “I can so relate to this post! Pretty much in the same boat. And its hard to date when our special-needs kids take up so much of our focus”

First, her comment made me feel like its ok that I haven’t moved on and that I shouldn’t feel guilty over it, which is some of what the Avoidance post was about. And that I am not the only one out there with this feeling. Thank you for that, Tanya!

Second, her comment made me start to think that there should be a balance between how much we give to our kids and how much time we take for ourselves. I think this goes for all parents, not just those with special needs kids. When you become a parent, it is easy to loose who you are while giving your all to the kids.

What I need to do is find that balance, and I know it’s a delicate one to find, between focusing on Son and focusing on ME. As I was typing this, I remembered a conversation with my therapist about this. Obviously, I have not been practicing what she taught me back then.

I thought I was. When Son is with his father, I take time to do things I like to do; travel, bike ride, catch up on TV or books, spend time with friends and family. But maybe I need to do more than just the times the kid is not home. Maybe I need to start MAKING time for me.

So, I am back to my original conclusion that I need to work on my emotional health and have to figure out how to do that. While I would like to share my life with someone else, I don’t like the idea that my emotional health depends on that happening. So I will have to work to find what makes me happy without relying on someone else.

1 comment:

  1. there is nothing more important to the health of your child than a healthy you...and it also shows him some important things about life. hope you find that balance...smiles.


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