Sunday, September 5, 2010

What's your opinion..............

When my friend (HS) from High School visited this summer, we reminiced about high school when we were in the theatre club and how much we liked it. While I liked theatre, I loved being in the band and singing in the chorus.  Every once in a while I get my flute out to see if I still remember how to play.  I do!  And there's nothing like singing  in the car to the radio! One of the things HS said he would like to do is find something like our high school theatre club where he lives now.  That got me to thinking the same thing for me, but maybe musical in nature instead. 

In the local paper today there was an article where the community college singing group is looking for members!  There is no fees and no auditions, just weekly practices on Tuesday evenings and there is a Christmas concert.  Sounds like fate is telling me to go for it, right?  It would be great fun!  A chance to meet new people and do something I enjoy.  It would be a great Mission for Me.

As you know, I have an 11 year old son with Aspergers who is currently in therapy every other week, you guessed it, on Tuesdays.  The therapist is working with us toward discharge in the near future but Son still has some work to do. 

You also know that I don't so much for myself.  I work, I take care of Son, I take care of the house and my parents but I don't have very many hobbies of my own.  I feel guilty when I leave Son with a babysitter to enjoy some time with my girlfriends and I try to schedule my "Me time" when Son is with his father.

I would LOVE to join the chorus group but for now I would only be able to attend every other Tuesdays.  On the other Tuesdays, I would have to ask my parents to watch Son and get him ready for bed.  I am fairly sure they wouldn't mind, they are not home yet for me to ask.  I just don't know if I would be ok with doing something for ME on a school night and missing that time with Son.  I am totally on the fence about this idea.

What's YOUR opinion? Would you do this for yourself?  If you would do this for yourself, do you feel guilty leaving your child(ren) for the evening on a school night?


  1. every other tuesday...go for it...

  2. I think that once every fourteen days for a few hours is not a lot to ask for.

  3. feeling guilt isn't a bad thing -- it's unpleasant -- and it shows that you enjoy the time with Son and being a part of his life. i think this sounds like a great opportunity to you to be involved in the community and do something that is fun for you. this will re-fuel you to continue the work with Son and all of the rest of your responsibilities :).

  4. I think it's important that you do something for yourself now and again. Go for it!

  5. Do things for yourself. It is very important in many ways.

  6. Do things for you/yourself!
    You deserve it!

    B xx

  7. go for it,
    getting out and melting in is a cool way to stay fine tuned...

    if u miss the chance, u may miss another...after a long time, chances may be rare...

    Happy Days!

  8. You asked, so here it is. I think that we are able to be better parents when some of our own deep needs are met. I think of it like the safety briefing on airplanes. Put on your own mask before assisting others. I find that I have more energy, good, productive energy, for my kids if I've also managed somehow to have my own time. For me, it's an evening out each month with my wine club. And time in my daily schedule to write. Then I'm not quite the crabby mommy that I might otherwise be if I'm drowning myself in taking care of their needs. And I have to say that in your case of a high needs child, you ABSOLUTELY need time for yourself for the awesome challenge you've been given. I'd babysit for you if I could. (My Best has two high needs kids, so I know some of what you go through. Not pretending that I get it, at all.) Take care, and I wish you my best.


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