I am really lacking the Christmas Spirit this year. I don't have the energy to dig out the decorations and the tree. I don't want to shop for presents. I haven't started my Christmas cookies. I just don't want to do it.
My Daddy and ESM will be going to Iowa for Christmas with my step-brother and his family. This will be my first Christmas day without my Daddy EVER. We've always had Christmas breakfast together, at his home before Jakes was born and then at my house. I'm going to miss them this year.
Jakes was supposed to come to stay with me for the week between Christmas and New Years but yesterday he got mad at me and demanded that I give him his way or he wasn't going to come to stay after Christmas. He said he'd come on Christmas day for his presents and then go home. HA!
This is because I want him to stay with me for this weekend and he only wants to see me for dinner on Friday. He's picked out a place for us to have dinner on Friday and that's all he wants. When I told him no, he started making demands and ordering me to do it his way.
I told him that until he can speak nicely to me, I wasn't going to text or see him. We'll see how long it takes him to text me. I just want to run away.
I thought that with Jakes living away from me, we'd have a better relationship. Apparently, he still thinks he calls the shots with me. I don't know what to do. Do I stick to my guns and wait for him to contact me and risk loosing him completely? Or do I give in to his demands just to keep him in my life? Either way its a fight that I don't know if I can win. His father is backing him all the way, feeding him with things to say, poisoning him against me. I just want to run away.
Is AZ calling? lol