My Daddy passed away last Monday. It was the longest and hardest day of my life. I was there for him and ESM right up to the end. We held a memorial service for him over the weekend. I was able to stand up there and give the eulogy for him. Here is what I had to say about my Daddy.
Good morning. We are here to celebrate the life of Louis
James Wanner, Jr, better known as Jim.
I’m sure there are many of you here who didn’t know he was “Louis”.
Jim was born September 30, 1946 as
one of six children. He was raised in Baltimore MD,
until he enlisted in the Navy. In the
Navy, he saw the world, spending time on many ships and different shore duties.
In 1966 he married Kathleen
Gerwitz and they eventually had 2 children.
Jim spent 8 years in the Navy and it was after they had their first
child, Jimmy, that Jim decided to leave the Navy. He didn’t want his children to grow up
wondering which person coming off the ship was their Daddy.
42 years ago, Jim and Kathy moved
to Salem County and he became active in
Elsinboro’s community. He started as a
police officer helping to patrol and keep Elsinboro safe. Jim also was a volunteer fireman for many
years.
Jim has held many offices in the
Elsinboro government over the years, planning officer, zoning officer. He wanted to ensure the community where he
lived remained the wonderful place he had come to know it as.
After Jim left the Navy he went to
work at the Nuclear Power Plant as quality assurance. He wrote many of the policies and procedures
that are in place now. Again, he was
dedicated to many sure the plant was as safe as possible since he was living in
the community around it.
In addition to caring about the
community where he lived and raised his family, he was above all a family man
and dedicated husband, not only to his Kathy but to his second wife, Irene.
I wanted to share some things about
my daddy. Just some stories and tidbits
I remember about him. Some are just a
flash of a memory that has stayed with me and others are a bit longer…
Daddy was my hero, when I was a
little kid and even since I’ve become an adult. All my life, Daddy has been there. He worked hard to give us the life he thought
we should have, be it toys and clothes or a wonderful vacation to Disney World. He and My mom were a team, although mom
seemed to do most of the hard parenting.
But when I pushed my limits too hard, Momma would refer me to Dad with
the standard “Wait till your father gets home”.
That’s when I knew I had pushed too hard.
I remember dancing in the hallway on
Christmas mornings, very early
mornings, to wake up my parents so we could see what Santa brought. Daddy was usually the one to let us into the
living room to start the fun. I remember
the year Santa brought Big Kid Bikes. It
didn’t matter that it was December, we took them out for a ride right after the
sun came up.
Oh and Christmas was the only time
Daddy would drink Coffee. That changed
in later years but that was another reason that Christmas was so special to
me. The smell of coffee in the house was
lovely.
I remember listening to a recording
of me singing Silver Bells and Daddy saying how great his “baby girl”
sounded. Trust me, it wasn’t that good.
One day the bus dropped me off from
school and there in the driveway was my Daddy.
He was standing by my new 10-speed bike for graduation. It was just 8th grade graduation
but he was proud of me.
He sat next to me while I tried to
gently program the new syntax computer he had gotten. If you breathed wrong the thing would crash.
I remember Daddy laying on the ground
next to my brother when he’d broken his wrist. Daddy was trying to comfort him while the
ambulance was called. I also remember
Daddy telling the story of how the fire chief yelled at Daddy for not treating
my brother for shock while he waited for help to arrive. Dad knew the proper
protocols of an emergency situation but completely forgot them since his son
was the one laying on the ground.
He took me to practice parallel
parking in the Avenues of Salem. He made
me park between 2 REAL cars. No trash
cans or flags for me. Just the real
thing.
As I got older, I remember his
Christmas Eve trips to the jewelry store for a special present for mom. It
would usually be the nicest wrapped present under the tree or hidden in her
stocking.
My childhood is peppered with good
and bad stories but they are typical ones, you know parent teacher conferences,
holiday plays at school, arguing with them because I wanted to go somewhere and
they said no. OR if I went to Daddy to ask something, he would refer me to
momma and momma would refer me to Daddy. Can you say Ping Pong Ball? But for all that I loved both my parents, as
parents.
I was also fortunate enough to have a
chance to get to know my parents as people, friends, equals. Momma and I grew close through her
illness. She became my best friend and I
learned the importance of family through her.
Daddy took off work to help Momma
fight her illness. He would do whatever
he thought would make her happy and comfortable. He helped her to leave this world as
peacefully as possible. When she died, I
got the opportunity to get to know my father as a person, a man, a friend.
He was so proud of his grandson,
Jacob. He was the first person to see
Jacob in the hospital. He was the first
one to take pictures of him.
Every week Daddy would stop by or we
would meet him for dinner and he would take pictures of Jacob. Every week I could be assured of an email
with at least three pictures attached sent out to so many people. There are many of you in this room who
watched the first year or more of Jacob’s life in pictures.
And for the people who didn’t have
email, he would carry around his 3-ring binder filled with pictures. His brag book went everywhere he did.
Then Renie came into the picture. I
resisted at first. I was afraid of losing my daddy. I didn’t have to worry about that. Renie fit into the family, she didn’t take
Daddy away from it.
I remember when Jacob was toddling
around, I came home from work to find a green turtle sandbox in the driveway,
along with a rocket ship swing. After
dinner Dad and Renie stopped over to play sand with Jacob and push him in the
swing.
There was fishing on the river, some
where there is a picture of Dad holding Jacob by the straps of the life vest
cause Jacob is leaning WAY WAY over the edge. Dad did everything he could to
protect Jacob and to teach him the right way of doing things. And teaching Jacob things never stopped. Just a couple weeks ago, Daddy was teaching
Jacob about hooking the battery charger or some kind of wiring job to the
scooter chair. I don’t know what was
going on, I just know they were out there working together.
At Jacob’s first birthday, Dad and
Renie showed up with a trash bag full of balloons. And they dumped them right over Jakes
head! And Jacob loved it, lots of
squeals of joy! I think Jacob loved the
balloons more than any present he got that day.
I will be the first to admit I have
been spoiled by all three of my parents over the years. I have been and will
always be “Daddy’s Girl”
I have so many wonderful memories of
my daddy. As my friend, Ruth said to me
recently “there are dad’s and there are Daddy’s. You had a Daddy.” She is so right. I had a
Daddy who I loved with all my heart.
Goodbye Daddy, Give Momma a hug for
me! And I hope Aunt Auds gave you a little time before she picked you up to
throw you in the pool!
