Friday, November 30, 2012

Disrespectful

Respect is earned but there are instances when respect is given. Period, no questions asked. Rules are made to be followed no matter who is around to enforce them. This is what I believe and what I'd like to see happen at my house.  This is what I would expect from my child. An adult in the house gets respect period. 

AZ and a buddy packed up right after the holiday for a hunting trip to upstate NY. Because JRs mom is in trouble with the law again, JR stayed home. AZ said he'd be in touch with JR often while he was away.

I don't know how often AZ has been in touch with JR but I haven't heard from AZ much. That's OK. You need quiet and no ringing cell phone to bring home deer meat.

This time with JR has been annoying. He has never been disrespectful to me directly but his total disregard for the rules of the house has erked me to no end.

He has operated on his own schedule; has not informed me of any of his plans and has made a mess of the kitchen at all hours of the day and night.

He brought his girlfriend into his bedroom and shut the door. With me and Jakes in the living room watching TV. That is a big rule broken.

He decided that he didn't feel like going to school yesterday so he didn't.

But because AZ wants to be his "friend" and not the enemy, he let's JR do pretty much whatever he wants. And if I express an opinion or suggest imposing limits for JRs actions I get a shoulder shrug and ignored. I am not allowed to parent JR but then his parents don't do it either.

I have told AZ the bigger infractions by JR but not about the party in the camper on Saturday night, the vodka gummy worms and the vodka kool-aid. That will come when AZ gets home.
I am so disgusted with JRs blatant disregard for the house rules.  I would never ask AZ to choose me over his son and I don't think he would anyway.
I don't hold hope that AZ will change his parenting style.  He takes the least conflicting way out of every situation.

Am I over reacting?  Maybe. But I am very hurt at the way JR took advantage of the situation.  And I've been frustrated and hurt in the past by AZ's inability to discipline and impose reasonable limits for his son.

When AZ gets back, I think we will have to have ANOTHER talk about things.

4 comments:

  1. You have a right to be angry based on what you've said here. That behavior is not acceptable!

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  2. ugh...i would have a hard time living with it...just saying...

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  3. You've got a right to say that it HAS to change. It is your house too. I'd be very angry and probably yell. A lot.

    I hope you can talk and AZ realizes that this is major. And that you aren't going to put up with it.

    Good luck and I'm keeping you in my thoughts!

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  4. A tough situation. Stick to your guns, as Mum used to say, and stay calm.

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