The See Saw

Excerpts from:

The Rum Tum Tugger by T. S. Eliot

The Rum Tum Tugger is a terrible bore:

When you let him in, then he wants to be out;

He's always on the wrong side of every door,

And as soon as he's at home, then he'd like to get about.

He likes to lie in the bureau drawer,

But he makes such a fuss if he can't get out.

Tugger was a curious cat who never seemed to be satisfied with his lot in life, on the wrong side of every door.  This is how I'm feeling. 

I made the decision to send Jakes to live with his dad and I think a part of me didn't think it would really happen.  I mean, JF hasn't exactly been there to help with things previously.

JF hadn't gotten back to me about any of this or a time frame for changing custody.  I think he was waiting for me to change my mind.  I sent a message to him today asking when he wanted Jakes to move in with him.  Since he can't get a larger apartment until the end of October, we decided that Jakes will move in with him and start school on Halloween.

This is what I wanted.  This is what Jakes and I NEED in order to have a good relationship.  I need a break from dealing with his attitudes and disabilities alone all these years.

But like Tugger on the wrong side of the door, I'm having doubts that this is REALLY the thing I want to do.  Am I really ready to take a break from being a full time mom?  Am I really ready to give up the control of making the decisions on everything regarding Jakes?  Am I really ready to accept this?

Earlier this week, I contacted Youth Case Management to set us up for a needs assessement.  10 minutes before JF got back to me, the therapist called to set up an appointment.  If we qualify for their services (and I can't imagine that we wouldn't) this could give us another chance to make it work between us.  But, do I have it in me for another round?  Would it truly be what is best for Jakes?

I fought like MAD to make my marriage work, only to find out how much happier and healthier I can be on my own.  If I continue to try to find ways of making this work between Jakes and I, could I only be postponing the inevitable and making things worse between Jakes and I?

Yes, I am looking forward to peace in my home and not having to fight Jakes for EVERYTHING.  I am not looking forward to being even more alone in my own home.  I am looking forward to the break I will have, the less stress in my home, not having to run all over the place for Drs appointments, the therapy appointments, etc.

Yes, there is some doubt that what I am really and truly doing what is best for Jakes.  I think it is what's best for him and for myself at this point in our lives.  There is no way to know what the future holds and if this is the "right" thing to do.  I think its the right thing to do at this point in our life.  And it doesn't have to be permanent.

if you want to see Rum Tum Tugger in action, click here and check out that pelvis action!  oh baby!  swoon!

I Have ADD - Tuesday Ramblings

This is going to a short and sweet entry.  I have not been able to concentrate on anything for long periods of time.  I even downloaded a Clive Cussler book from the library that is not keeping my attention.  Couldn't be because of all I have on my mind, could it?

Dad got good news, health wise.  He had a colonoscopy where they removed 8 polyps. None of which were cancerous!  Wonderful news!  ESM had a colonoscopy as well and only had one polyp.  She's still waiting for the pathology to come back.  I get to go for a colonoscopy in December.  sigh........

I went to my Mom's best friends home for a visit over the weekend.  When Mom was dying she said that Judy was to take over being Jakes grandmom.  And she has!  She has also taken over being Mom to me.  I got lots of comfort from Judy this past weekend.  She and I can share memories and stories of Mom and I like that.  I needed Mom this past week.

Jakes went to his other grandparents, Mam and Pop-pop's on Friday and his father picked him up from there on Saturday.  Fortunately, his father was willing to help me out by separating Jakes and I this weekend.  Even if he wasn't, I was going to call Mam and Pop-pop to take Jakes.

On Monday morning, I called the In-home therapy people to get set up for a needs assessment.  Hopefully, we'll qualify for Youth Case Management, which will open lots of doors for services and supports for us.

This doesn't mean that I have changed my mind about Jakes living with his father.  This is so that hopefully Jakes and I can get along until his father has moved and made the changes necessary to take him.  Also, if things don't work out at his fathers, we will have the needs assessment completed and can pick up from there.

It seems that Jakes and his father have their own agenda for this situation.  It seems that JF thinks that I'll settle down and change my mind.  AND he's said so to Jakes.  That's why Jakes doesn't think he's moving.  Guess its time to step up my nagging of JF, ask where he is on moving and such.  And share the info about the boarding school.

Right now, all I want is to get Jakes sent to his fathers and for me to run away to AZ, permanently.  Of course, there are many complications in that scenario as well.  sigh.

Above all else, I want to find happiness in my life.  I can't remember when I felt happiness.  When do I get my turn?  Why does it seem that my idea of happiness for myself has to be without Jakes?  Questions to ponder.

Sunday Check In

Just a quickie to say I'm doing ok.  After the turmoil of last week, I'm okay.  I am not regretting my decision to send Jakes to live with his father because I do think it whats best for Jakes.  I am regretting that I'll have to pay child support and the impact that's going to have on my way of life.  Selfish, I know.

Jakes is spending the weekend with his father, even though its my weekend.  Jakes and I needed to be separated.  I ran away to a friends house for yesterday.  It was nice to leave everything behind and relax.  Judy is Mom's best friend and she has become a mom to me.  I unloaded everything to her and she helped to reassure me that its probably for the best.

My Dad understands that I feel I need a break from Jakes and supports that I think this is for the best.  But he doesn't think that JF will take Jakes.  Yes, he's said that he would but JF has failed me and Jakes many times before.  So, Dad has a point.  I need to keep my feet on the ground and accept that there is the possibility that Jakes might not leave me.

I need to come up with an alternative plan.  I have dug out the paperwork from the in-home therapists and am prepared to call them back into the picture if necessary.  I have looked up a residential school where two of my cousins graduated.  They had great experiences there.  That's an option, possibly.

I have contacted my therapist to give her a heads up on the situation and that I might need to come back to her.  I don't think I need her right now but I will be paying attention to how I feel.  When I want to hide under my desk, then I know I need her and maybe to increase my meds.

So for now, I am fine. 

Amazing Stuff That Floats By My House

I have written before about living on The River and all that comes with it.  We have lovely, peaceful mornings.  We have floods and animals, such as the baby eel that I picked up and the crabs that come from the meadow during high tides.  We've had Santa pull up to the beach around Christmas time.  We have a sand bar out front at low tide that Jaxon and Jacob love to play on. And we have wave action during storms.

Lovely boats sail by all the time. We also loose the beach in the winter.  Brrrrrr  And the Geesy's love to come and feast on the corn we put out.

Lots of differnt things to look for.  Last weekend I saw something VERY strange.

This floated by.
What is it?



A piece of land, with trees growing and everything

Never a dull moment on the River!

The Decision Has Been Made

I was actually very proud of myself because lately, there hasn't been much turmoil in my life to blog about.  Jakes and I had been doing pretty well, just the normal butting of heads, nothing much to worry about.  JF has been quiet and cooperative.

Since school has started, Jakes and I have been butting heads more often over his school work.  He doesn't think that I should monitor it.  He says that he can do it.  And when I talk to him about missing assignments or failing grades, he gets hostile, mean and this morning, violent.

Earlier this week, I was able to talk with him calmly to explain that I am legally responsible for monitoring his work.  But that if he is actually doing the work and getting passing grades, I wouldn't have to nag him about it.  It would be like I'm not monitoring him at all.  He said that he understood and that he could do it and make the passing grades.  I told him that's great, now show me.

I haven't checked his grades for a couple of days, he said he didn't have homework, other than reading.  I told him I wanted the reading done before we go away on Saturday and he said he'd get it done.

This morning, his reading folder was on the kitchen counter and I looked to see how many lines he has.  Only 2 out of 20.  I told him he needs to get reading or we weren't going away this weekend and I would cancel his riding lesson as well.  He got mad and started yelling at me.  I sent him to his room. 

While there, I checked the grades online and he's failing 2 classes because of not turning in homework. When he came out of his room, I mentioned that he has assignments to turn in and he flipped out.  Instead of walking away, I flipped right back at him.

Leaving out lots of details, we ended up in a power struggle, with him pushing me, me pushing him back and lots of screaming.  I told him I was calling the child welfare office to report this and get their assistance in transferring custody to his father.  I told him to get his school stuff and get out of my house.

I was wrong for not walking away, but I am SO sick and tired of the power struggle between us.  He thinks he is in charge and won't accept that he's not.  I've tried to explain it to him when we're both calm and of course I've screamed it at him.  I've done therapy with him, without him. I've done family stabilization programs, in home therapies.  I'm on medication, he's on medication.  And I don't know where else to turn for help.

Its time for his father to step up and be a father.  I do not feel safe in the home with my child anymore.  I should not have to be treated this way by my child.  My child should not be treated this way by me.  I have done everything I know how in order to make life better for my child and myself.  I think at this point, the only way to salvage my relationship with my child is to let him go.

Animals in My Home

Last month, I introduced Shadow to the Nest.  He's settled in very nicely.  Shadow is still a lovebug and gets along very well with Jaxon.  They run back and forth chasing each other.  Shadow even plays ball with Jaxon.

Play Ball

Shadow loves to snuggle up with me at night.  I have to scratch him all over, even his belly, then when he's ready to fall asleep, he puts his paw in my hand and I have to hold his paw while he drifts off.  Too cute!

Shadow Chillin'

The Vet says that he is about 2 yrs old and needs to be fixed.  We'll get to that.  He has a scratch on his cornea that needs eye drops but he's so good about letting us put them in.  When the vet prescribed the drops he hinted that it would be hard to put them in.  Shadow jumps on my bed and lays down.  He doesn't like having them put in, but he doesn't fight me or Jakes to put them in.  Of course, he knows that he'll get lots of scratches and loving while we're doing it. 

Really Mom?  Get outta my face

Kitters seems to have accepted Shadow.  They can at least be in the same room together without hissing and growling.  Saylors on the other hand is still complaining to him when she sees him.  She is what I call my high maintenance kitty and took longer to warm up to Jaxon.  I know she will eventually.

My ball!

Overall, I'm thrilled with having Shadow added to the family.  He's been a good addition.

Sounds in My House

Sniff. Sniff. Cough. Cough. Aaaaaaachoooooooooo. Honk honk. Plop. Plop. Fizz. Fizz. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz zzz zzz zzz zzz.

End if summer colds Bite the big one.

Sunday Check in

Its been a lovely weekend here.  The weather has been cool and cloudy. Perfect sleeping weather!  I love snuggling under the covers in the cold room.

I've taken time for myself this weekend.  I've been working on processing Jakes newest diagnosis.  I've been reading about epilepsy.  Its a scary thing!  All the new terminology to learn!  I guess its a good thing to be scared of it but I have to know how to handle Jakes if he has a seizure with me.  The first aid for a seizure person is pretty easy, don't do much of anything.  Turn them on their side, loosen any tight clothing, and protect their head.  Their seizure should stop on its own, but if it doesn't call 911.

I sent the diagnosis information to JF and his parents.  The last time I dropped Jakes off at the other grandparents house, Mam was very interested in what was going on.  On Friday, she called me to thank me for the information. She was SO happy that I'd sent it.  JF had given them the cliffs-notes version of it.  I told her I would scan in some other information for her and email it.  She loved it.

Neicy and I spent yesterday afternoon together, something we haven't done lately.  We were shopping for kitchen floor for me and she had a list of things to get pricing on at the home improvement stores.  We of course, ended up at Target and the mall for a lap around there.  Lots of girl talk and bitching.  Just what we both needed!

My parents and Kathy have been away since Thursday.  I got left home to care for the animals.  I don't mind, The Compound has been quiet!  Plus, the next time I want to go away and leave my animals home, they owe me!  lol

I went to my Uncle's funeral service Saturday morning.  It was good to see family and friends that I don't usually see.  It was sad because Uncle Don and Aunt Do are both gone.  But they are back together, which is what Uncle Don wanted. After being married for 56 years, he missed her so much.  There are so many good memories of growing up with them.  Uncle Don walked me down the aisle at my wedding.  Mom was sick and Dad wanted to be with her.  Plus he didn't approve of my choice of husband.  Uncle Don looked so proud standing with me on his arm at the back of the church.

Last night I curled up with a glass or two of wine, my Kindle and blankets by a camp fire.  It was a perfect evening for it!

Time to get moving, got laundry, cat box to scoop and dinner to get started!  Happy Sunday!

Invasion

In the past few weeks, the East Coast has experienced some pretty freaky weather and other natural disturbances.  We shook and swayed through the earthquake that was centered in Virginia.  We've endured inches beyond inches of rain, either from storms or hurricanes.

My little neck of the woods was largely spared by Hurricane Irene.  Since I live on the river with a tidal marsh directly behind my house, we expected to have lots of flooding.  Fortunately, we didn't during the storm.  Our flooding came after the storm was done.  After all the little rivers, creeks and marshes had drained their excess waters into my river, which then flooded our little marsh. 

We didn't suffer any damages from this flooding but we were invaded.  Now, I've reported before all the creaures we have around here, the crabs, the fish, the bugs, the baby eels.

Just get on with it, what were you invaded by!

Mud Crabs by the HUNDREDS!  We hear them before we saw them.  They were skitttering along the curb and all over the road.  We think they came out of the marsh because the tides were so high.  They came up with the water, then got "stuck" on dry land or in the road.  They knew which way to run to get back to the water.  That's what the skittering sounds were, them running for the marsh.

By the time ESM got out there with her camera, we had chased most of them back into the marsh.  They came visiting at the high tides for three days.  Then the tides started staying at the normal levels and we haven't seen them in the road since.  Pretty freaky of Mother Nature.  Here's some pictures:

There are three in this picture
Some of them had one big claw while others had 2 smaller claws
The big claw could be on the left ot the right.



My what a big claw you have!



Skitter on back to where you came from

Jakes spent lots of time outside just after high tide for several days checking on the crabs.  And to be honest, I hope they stay far, far away!

Memory

I recently lost two lovely people in my life; my Aunt Do and Uncle Don. I don’t know why we called her Aunt Do, her name was Gloria. I think one of my cousins couldn’t say her name and that’s where the nickname Do-Do came from.

There are so many memories of growing up around them, surrounded by their love.

**************

Jesse’s earliest memory of Aunt Do and Uncle Don was spending time at their house visiting. Jesse would play in the closet in Walt’s room. It was a big closet, with stickers all over the door. Jesse and her cousins would pretend many different things, it was a spaceship, it was a time machine; whatever their imagination could conjure. They always had the greatest adventures at Aunt Do and Uncle Dons’.

**************

Jesse clamored over the tailgate into the back of the station wagon with her two cousins and brother. She watched as her aunts and mother all piled into the seats of the car. This was their monthly shopping trip and lunch out. Jesse loved this trip. They would stop at the butchers’ shop, where all the kids would get a hunk of cheese. Then it would be onto the grocery store with the sawdust on the floor. Jesse would drag her feet through it, annoying her mother. After the grocery store, they would stop at Pizza Hut for lunch. Jesse loved being able to eat her own whole pizza.

The ride home would be more cramped with groceries and meats for all four aunts and Jesse’s mom. But the cousins would all swish together and yell when the load would shift around the turns. Aunt Do would stop and drop everyone off, the kids helping carry in the bags at each stop.

***********

After greeting Aunt Do upstairs, she ran to the basement door and down the steps. In the basement there was a finished off area with a pool and ping pong table where the kids liked to play. In the back of the basement was Uncle Don’s work area. He was a hunter and fisherman in his spare time. Hanging in the area were hundreds of muskrats turned inside out and their skins stretched out for drying. It was gross. Uncle Don was working on skinning his latest catch and there was blood and guts everywhere.

Jesse ran in gave Uncle Don a quick kiss and ran away before he could tease her with the innards.

***********

Jesse pulled into the driveway of Aunt Do and Uncle Don’s house. Uncle Don was in the garden. Jesse wandered over to say hello before going into the house to visit with Aunt Do. Of course, Uncle Don had to show off his fabulous garden. He loved being out there with his plants, making them grow and flourish. After a big hug and kiss hello, the tour started. Jesse checked out all the plants, big and little. She would have helped to pull weeds but there were none. That’s how meticulous Uncle Don was about his garden.

************

Jesse woke up to the smell of pumpkin pie and went into the kitchen to investigate. Her mom had been up for hours, baking pies and was starting on the breads. In a few hours, the family would pack up and drive over the creek to Aunt Do and Uncle Don’s house for Thanksgiving Dinner. Aunt Do and Uncle Don’s kids would be there, along with their families. Aunt Auds and her boys would be there, it would be one crowded place to be. However, it was tradition and it was the only place Jesse wanted to be for Thanksgiving.

When Jesse got there, Uncle Don was in the kitchen carving the turkey; Aunt Do was working on the mashed potatoes. There were big hugs and kisses all around. Jesse headed into the living room where the table was setup with all the leaves and room for 16 people. But there was still a kids table in the dining room.

What a feast was on the table! Every kind of holiday food you’d imagine was there. Then there were the pies in the dining room. On the TV was football, a thanksgiving tradition. It was a great day with all the family together and happy.

***********

Jesse and Uncle Don were sitting next to each other while the family sang happy birthday to them. When the song was over, they hurried to see who could blow out the most candles, which of course ended up with the two laughing at each other. Jesse always teased Uncle Don about being born on her birthday. This went on for many shared birthdays.

************

Jesse ran to the door. It was Christmas morning, they’d already opened all their presents from Santa, and now it was time for breakfast with Aunt Do and Uncle Don. Jesse’s mom made cinnamon rolls, there were cookies, and it was the one time of year that the coffee percolator was used. Jesse loved the smell of coffee brewing; it was a sign of Christmas.

Breakfast was served, the adults sat around munching on Christmas cookies while the kids played with their new toys.

************

In times of tragedy, Aunt Do and Uncle Don were there for Jesse’s family and the same when there was tragedy in Aunt Do and Uncle Don’s life. When their daughter was killed, Jesse’s father went to the hospital to identify her. When Jesse’s mom had a car accident, Aunt Do was at the house to help. When Jesse’s mom was dying, Aunt Do was there to help care for her.

***********

Jesse was 7 months pregnant, her mother was on hospice, and it was hard for Jesse to deal with. After one particularly trying visit with her mother, Jesse couldn’t face going home. Instead she drove down the road to Aunt Do’s house. Once inside, Aunt Do wrapped her arms around Jesse and let her cry it all out. No judgment, just love.

***********

Jakes ran into the house ahead of his mom, Jesse. He ran and climbed onto Uncle Don’s lap for hugs and kisses. Jakes called him Uncle Goofy. They hugged and kissed, tickled and giggled. Then it was Jesse’s time for hugs and kisses from Uncle Don. Then Uncle Don took Jakes on a tour of the garden, another generation sharing in the love of gardening. Jesse would stop over on most Saturday mornings after Jakes was born.

So many memories, so much love shared. We’ve said good bye to two wonderful people, who loved each other and their families. They are back together in heaven, Aunt Do being a nurturing caregiver, Uncle Don being a little silly and teasing. I’ll miss them both.

 
 
I wrote this from a prompt at Theme Thursday.

Swinging - WW

Check out other Wordless Wednesday participants



Just Swinging Around at the local festival
My new Favorite pic of Jakes.





Its Okay Tuesday!

I'm playing with Amber over at Airing My Dirty Laundry, One Sock at a Time who has been doing Its Okay Tuesday for a long time now.  I'm so glad she hooked up a linky to it!

Its okay to worry and wonder what's next for Jakes with the new diagnosis. Worry is okay as long as it doesn't take over our lives.

Its okay to not have much to say here.  It'll come eventually.

Its okay to be frustrated with a mouthy pre-teen with Aspergers and ADHD.  There are other mothers out there who are going through the same thing.  It will get better eventually.

Head over to Amber's and play along!

Fragmented Thinking

Its Friday.  So happy its Friday.  For a short work week, this has been a looooong week filled with stresses.  I'm ready for it to be over.

Dad's visit to the cardiologist went well.  They are not sure if he had a heart attack or not, but since he's starting to feel better, there really isn't anything to be done.  Except for him NOT to carry luggage down three flights of steps again.  Dr said that's the stuff that will kill him, with his heart condition.  The Dr prescribed nitroglycerin for Daddy to carry around in case it happens again and told him to get himself to the ER ASAP.

Dad also had a colonoscopy this week.  In the past, they have found cancerous polyps, some of which could be removed at the time of the scope and others that required further surgery.  This time they found 10 polyps, 8 of which they removed.  None appeared cancerous, but we have to wait for the pathology to come back.  Fingers crossed and prayers said!

As far as Jakes new diagnosis, I'm doing ok with it.  I contacted the Epilepsy Foundation and they are sending me educational information and I have to find out what Jakes actual diagnosis is as well as the type of seizure he has.  Once I know this, the Foundation will be able to better educate me on what to look for and expect.  The woman I spoke with said that he could have been having them all along, I just don't know what to look for.  Or this could be a new onset, with puberty.  Either way, it doesn't matter.  What matters is that we know now and will do what is necessary to care for Jakes.

I emailed all this info to JF but wasn't holding my breath on a response.  The NEXT morning, he sent a text thanking me for the information.  Now I know why the East Coast is flooding.

I am making plans for some girl time this weekend.  There is a celebration in a local town and Janet, Lori and I will meet there and turn our kids loose on the rides and such.  We're finalizing those plans now.  I can't wait to hang with my girls!  Its been too long!

Short but sweet!  Its all I got right now.  Have a wonderful weekend everyone!

The News Floored Me

I don't know if you remember but back in March, I got the dreaded call "we're at the ER but don't worry" from Jakes father.  Jakes had a seizure while visiting his dad's for the weekend.   Jakes was sent home and everything was fine. 

I made an appointment with a Pedi-Neurologist and she ordered an MRI and a 24-hour EEG.  Today she called with the results and I was floored.  Jakes has a seizure disorder.  While he was wearing the EEG he had 2 little seizures when he was drifting off to sleep.  SCARY!  Do I watch my child sleep now?  Probably not, cause I like my sleep too much.

Also, the MRI showed that he has an inferior vermal hypoplasia.  In the cerebellum, there is a thing called  a Vermal.  Jakes is smaller than normal, which is something that they see often in Autistic and Aspergers patients.  The Dr expected to see this because of Jakes history of AS.  This is probably the most definitive way of knowing that Jakes indeed has AS, along with the psychological testing we've had done over the years.

The Dr thinks that because of Jakes history that he stands a 98% chance of having another seizure.  SCARY, again.  So she wants to medicate him for seizures.  Its a pretty mild medication with few side effects, one being that its a mood stabilizer.  How cool is that?!?!  Just in time for puberty!

While on the phone with her, I was floored, overwhelmed and just plain mind boggled!  I had no clue what questions to ask or what information I needed to get from her.  I took notes, fortunately.  I have come up with a couple of questions that I want to ask..

When I got off the phone with her, I just wanted to have a meltdown.  I mean, how much more am I supposed to deal with where my child is concerned.  I don't want to have to deal with more medical stuff with Jakes.  I was looking forward to being done with Jakes medical stuff for a while.  I wanted to wallow for a while and feel sorry for myself for having a defective child.  I don't want to DO THIS anymore.

And I did wallow.   I contemplated floating away on high tide, but the tide was coming IN and that would take me to town. Boring!  I'd have to wait for the tide to head out to float someplace cool.  For about an hour.   Then reason started kicking in.  This is something that is manageable.  Something that could possibly go away and never be a problem again.  Its not like he's in a coma or unable to care for himself.  Nothing about him has changed.  He is still JAKES.

So, I am all about the research and finding the support services.  I am going to call the Epilepsy Foundation to get more information on seizures and caring for Jakes with them.  I want to find out more about the inferior vermal hypoplasia thingy and see what that's about.  I've got to look up and read about the medication they want to put him on.  And lastly, I am going to have to fight with the insurance to get him the medication in the name brand because that's what the Dr wants.

This is not the end of the world.  Just a bump in the road of life.  Once we get the education and the medication started, life will be just as it was, only instead of one pill in the morning, Jakes will have to take 2.

I have to do this.  My child is depending on his mom to make things right, safe and happy.  I can do this.

Reaching out for Ideas

Okay, my blogging buddies!  I need ideas!  And ya'll are great for ideas! I know you'll come through for me!

My agency has a program where we see kids between the ages of 10 and 16 for 7 weeks.  Once they complete the 7 weeks, we hold a "Celebrate You" party for them where they are given snacks and drinks.  I am writing a grant to ask for an increase in the amount of funding we receive so that we can give graduation gifts to the kids as well.  There is no dollar limit set as yet for the gifts, but the bosses would like to see something that could be considered "life skills" worthy for the kids.  The kids are from our poorest area that we serve for our prevention efforts.

What I need from you, my wonderful Bloggy Buddies is ideas for gifts.  Brian, I'm guessing this might be right up your alley!  :-)

Any ideas are welcome, even if you are just suggesting search words!  I've googled everything I can think of.  Thanks so much!

School Days and Other Randomness Thrown In

Today was the first day of school for Jakes and it was a rough one.  Not because he had trouble getting up, he's an early riser like me.  But because of his MOUTH and attitude.  I was up for about 10 minutes when he had gotten mad at me and slammed the door to his room.  All because I told him to get breakfast and get ready for school.  He felt I was Nagging him.

The second door slam came about 45 minutes later when I told him he would be responsible for making his own lunch this year.  And he was not allowed to buy lunch at school this week.  He doesn't feel making his lunch should be his responsibility, yet when I try to do something to help him, he gets mad.  So I decided he can be responsible for getting himself completely ready for school, with no help from me.

He finally made his lunch and the third door slam came when he slammed out of the house to walk to the bus stop.  Jaxon was jumping for joy when he saw Jakes leaving with his book bag.  Jaxon LOVES to walk Jakes to the bus.  So we followed, even though Jakes was practically running away from us to avoid me.  He didn't speak to me at all at the bus stop, but he did finally pose for a picture on his way to the bus.



Jakes first day of 7th grade



Dad is not feeling too well lately.  When we evacuated to the hotel for Irene, they had to carry their bags down from the third floor on Monday because the elevator was out of order.  I had left on Sunday night when the power came back on cause I wanted MY bed.  Had I stayed Sunday night, I would have been there to help carry the bags and Dad wouldn't be feeling so badly.

Dad has Congestive Heart Failure and 2 leaky heart valves.  He's been doing ok with medication management but all that exercise last weekend seems to have done some damage.  He has an appointment with his cardiologist today and hopefully they can work something out to give him some relief.

I'm a little down in the dumps lately.  Extremely tired and sleeping a lot.  I think I need a swift kick in the pants to get me moving.  I don't know why I'm feeling this way, nothing has changed in my life recently.  I'm not even that worried about Dad.  I'll have to see how long this goes on and if I have to do anything to fix it.

We're bracing for more rain and flooding this week.  We're getting the remains of TS Lee.  I hope my friends who've already experienced his drenching effects are safe and drying out now!  I'm also keeping an eye on Katia in the Atlantic.  As of this morning, she's a category 4 hurricane but is not expected to make landfall in the US.  Fingers crossed that she just blows by.

Over the last couple of weeks we've had some unusual phenomenons happen in my area.  We experienced the ground shaking of an earthquake.  It was centered in Virginia but its vibrations were felt up and down the east coast.  It was WEIRD!  I was in my hammock, swinging.  The swinging motion slowed and eventually the hammock started moving back and forth instead of the side to side motion.  The river even seemed to shake.  WEIRD!  I was hundreds of miles away from the epicenter and I don't think I'd want to be any closer!

Then that same week, we had some terrible storms go through that dumped tremendous amounts of rain on parts of the county which caused massive flooding, bridges and road were washed away.  Fortunately, not in my part of the county.  Then came Irene or as we've nicknamed her, ESM.  My step mothers name is Irene and we had a ball teasing her about the devastation she was creating along the East Coast.  I asked her which state she liked the best.  She said Georgia and I think GA was spared pretty much.  One of her bosses called her on Tuesday and thanked her for taking it easy on the county.  We really could have had much worse than what we got.  We were very fortunate. 

Ok, enough babbling.  I have some other stuff to get working on.   Happy Tuesday everyone!

Neatest Information

I found the neatest information and wanted to share with you.  In doing some research on hobbies, I found that most colleges, such as MIT, post their past courses online for FREE.  Yes, you can take a course from MIT, with all the notes, slide shows, tests and everything for FREE! Some of the classes that I looked at needed a text book which you could purchase through Amazon.com for very cheap.  For the class I was looking at the books would have cost $12 and $8 of that was shipping costs.

There are courses that you don't need to purchase textbooks for or that have all the information right there online.

I was amazed at the course catalog for MIT and other notable universities!  Of course, you are not getting credits for taking these classes but if you ever wanted to know about Astrodynamics or linear algebra, here's your chance!  I know I'm going to be checking out some of the courses, I just haven't decided which one first.

Here are the websites that I've found so far:

MIT: http://ocw.mit.edu/index.htm

Online Education Database:   http://oedb.org/library/beginning-online-learning/200-free-online-classes-to-learn-anything/

Free Online Classes and Online Courses     http://www.guidetoonlineschools.com/articles/tips-and-tools/online-classes

Lots of choices of things to learn and who knows where it might lead!

Hobbies

When I was growing up, my mom was the most talented person I knew.  In addition to keeping the house and raising us kids, she sewed beautiful projects, she cross-stitched, and she gardened and canned the veggies.

Since I have been out on my own, I have never found that "thing" to do to amuse myself when the housework is done and the kid is in bed.  I've typically sat in front of the TV or surfed the web looking at stupid mind-numbing stuff.  Occasionally, I will find a book to read.

I can sew a bit (mom taught me the basics) but I never fell in love with it the way she did. I certainly don't have her talent.  She could see a dress in a store, do a quick drawing of it and come home to stitch it up.  I don't have the patience for cross-stitching and just don't have the desire to learn knitting or crocheting.

At one point, I played the flute and I love just about all things associated with music.  My choir practices start up again in September.  I can't WAIT!

I am looking for hobbies to do in the evenings after the house work is done and the kid is in bed.  I am looking a hobby that won't necessarily take me out of the house but has the possibility of expanding my social base.  I would love for it to be fairly inexpensive.

What are some interesting things you do with your down time?